


Empty promises of romance

by calciyum



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Angst and Humor, Awkward Flirting, F/M, I promise this is not a soppy love story, I'm Bad At Tagging, Jedi Code, Lightsaber Battles, New Jedi Order, Pamarthe, Pre-Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-07 08:15:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13430652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calciyum/pseuds/calciyum
Summary: A failure of a Jedi, living a life of fear and lies. Rylan is almost certain that she will spend her last days fixing broken down speeders, not that she's complaining, but she can't let go of the past and the past has a tight grip on her. She is forced to confront her fear, her fear of falling in love.(Set pre - force awakens)





	Empty promises of romance

"You can just send 'er in then tomorrow... yeah, yeah, we've got ya covered"

The last thing Rylan needed was another bantha fodder speeder getting sent to the shop. She rolled out from under a bright red airspeeder, which had some sort of blocked pipe that neither Rylan, Em or Guan could figure out. It was driving Rylan berserk. Before she acquired that damned speeder, she saw herself as an okay mechanic, but it killed her confidence.

"What are you doing?" Rylan stormed into Guan's cramped office space and slammed the thin sheet metal door. She crossed her arms and demanded answers.  
"What am I doing? I'm giving you a job. This pilot, dang, I forgot his name, his starfighter was basically blown up in a hop, and you're going to fix it" He said all of this without looking up from his datapad. He did not have any time for Rylan's temper.

"Well, you could've warned me beforehand. I'm busy, with the cluck of metal you couldn't even figure out. If I don't know what I'm doing with a speeder, then how in Hoth am I supposed to fix a starfighter, that according to you has basically been blown up." 

Rylan was fuming, she sometimes couldn't stand working for Guan because of him liking to inform her and the rest of the mechanics about things like this at the very last second. She leaned against the cool metal wall and sighed, trying to calm herself.

"Do you want to get paid or not? Look, I don't have time for this and I already told the kid he could pop by." Guan retaliated. 

Rylan groaned and gently banged her head against the wall. She knew there was no use arguing. Rylan turned around and began to stroll back towards the door leading to the garage.

"Ry." She spun around on her heels and raised her eyebrows to Guan. Clearly irritated.

"That kid, he... he's with the Resistance. I want you to stay low, don't talk and hide your lightsaber, it's in your boot, I can see it." He finally looked up from his datapad and gave Rylan a serious look.

"You're kidding right. You know why I'm here, you-" Guan cut her off.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I heard it a million times from you. You don't want to be involved on either side." He rolled his eyes. "But a job is a job, and you're getting paid, so cool it"  
Rylan looked down at her feet and began fiddling with her string bracelet. She once again, was compelled to explain herself.

"It's not that I don't want to pick a side, I do want to somehow help, but... you know, I can't be found. You know if I were to join up with the Resistance, you know I was trained as a Jedi and you know that puts a target on me, and if I somehow joined the First Order I would be executed for who I am. I can't win." Rylan sighed. She felt hopeless. She felt like a failure of a Jedi, which undoubtfully she was. Her master, who also happened to be her father would be disappointed. Not only for feeling torn, but also for abandoning her training and what was left of the New Jedi Order.

"Ry, I know it's hard for you, but its been here for six years now. You have to let go. You have to stop carting around your lightsaber everywhere and you have to stop using the force. Don't think that I don't see you, making wrenches and bolts float." He smiled at the last sentence. Guan felt sorry for the girl, she was being torn apart at the seams, wanting to help but not knowing where to start.

"Ya know, by fixing up all these ships, you're in a way helping. You're fixing ships that pilots will hopefully shoot down some TIE fighters with." This was Guan's way of making Rylan feel at least a tiny, little bit better.

"Ha, yeah. I guess." Even though Rylan has heard this too many times before, it never failed to make her smile. "Imma head back now, to working on my lump of metal."  
"Have fun." Guan looked back down to his datapad, containing all of the information about the speeders and ships present at the shop currently.

Rylan walked straight passed the red airspeeder without batting an eye and headed outside for some fresh air. Just thinking about that damned speeder made her want to become a Sith.

The Pamarthe sky was golden, and even though the sun was not completely set, two moons were visible in the sky. Rylan sat down on a scrap piece of metal, possibly from an old Imperial ship, and sighed. She missed her home planet, Lothal, the vast farmlands and tall trees. She missed her old life, even her grueling Jedi training which was practically deemed useless to her now. She knew there was no use in reminiscing about the past, she knew it made her feel unhappy, but in a strange way, it brought her comfort. Rylan knew she had the force flowing through her. She knew she wasn't weak. That brought her the comfort she needed. 

Rylan heard the distinct sound of an X-wing in the distance, she wondered if that was the pilot Guan had been talking about, most likely it was. She wasn't expecting him, she assumed that he'd be there in the morning, not now. Guan wasn't a fan of people booking in late, as his shop was always busy. It was difficult to arrange spots for ships and get mechanics working on multiple projects.

"Back to work." She mumbled quietly to herself and gently rose from her scrap metal "bench". It's not that Rylan didn't like or appreciate her job, she truly did. But it could get grueling sometimes. Before she began work as a mechanic for Guan, she had no previous experience fixing anything, except her lightsaber, which she had built on her own. Luckily for Rylan, she was a quick learner and training as a Jedi Knight prepared her for that. She worked and learned with the best, Em, who was an Outer Rim renowned mechanic. Fortunately for Rylan, Guan hadn't realized that she had no experience working in such environment, so she ended up getting the job.

Rylan jogged inside and used the Force to move the airspeeder to the side of the room. Out of the way for the X-wing that was due to arrive. She knew Guan would disapprove, but he can't expect her to pick that up without any help.

The black and orange X-wing landed outside. Rylan's stomach turned. She knew the Force was trying to tell her something. She didn't know what though, as she hadn't properly meditated in years and was almost out of touch with it. Well, she'll have to wait and see.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there!
> 
> This is my first attempt at writing Star Wars fanfiction. It is also, my first proper attempt at writing any type of fanfiction. Hopefully, you didn't gouge your eyes out while reading this chapter. I really appreciate any, and I mean any, constructive criticism you may have. If this story/chapter/thing doesn't flop, I'll try to update it at least once per week.


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